Boone Town

I have to admit, I'm much more excited about the Twins getting Bret Boone than I probably should be.
For as much as I have ripped on Michael Cuddyer (see 'I Hate You Number 5 - A Haiku'), Bret Boone's numbers are actually worse than those of No. 5.
I should also admit that Boone has always been one of my favorite Non-Twins players, even though I always thought he was on Roids. (Why isn't anyone talking about the steroid factor? - the Strib, the Geek, nobody brings it up!?!)
Thing is, as long as we're getting Boone for nothing, it's a great pickup. He's righthanded, still very good with the glove, and he's a VETERAN. Something we need.
Boone has a rep for being a little cocky and that's also a good thing.
I can just see him talking to Morneau:

JM (after a called 3rd strike): "That pitch was totally inside."
BB: "Why didn't you just hit it over the fence, pussy."
JM: "My elbow hurts."
BB: "What are you, 22? I'm 36 and play a positions where you have to do more than stand in one place all game long and I'm not complaining, pussy. God, what's with you Canucks? Do they only play 110 games in the Canadian Leagues? Sack up and start hitting the goddamm ball."

At least I hope so.
Truthfully, if Boone hits 10 homers and drives in 35 runs, that'd be great. If I had to bet money on it, I'd bet that Boone will do allright.
He'd better, because if he sucks again, his career is over.
He's going to be hitting 3-hole, my guess with Mauer moving up to 2.
Ideally, you could have:

LF Stewart
C Mauer
2B Boone
1B Morneau
CF Hunter
RF Jones
DH Ford/LeCroy
3B Punto
SS Castro
-Notice it alternates R/L all the way down. And notice I'm ready for LeCroy to start taking AB's from Lew Ford.

Of course, Gardy is to making lineups what Adam Sandler is to making good movies, so he'll probly bat Morneau 7th or something stupid.
The best news out of all this is that I don't think T-Ry is done. I still think the Twins might be in the market for Joe Randa. If they hold out til the deadline, the Reds might relent in demanding a top prospect.
Then you'd have Randa at 3rd, and presumably Punto at short with Castro as the utility guy. And all of a sudden you have an actual Major League infield.