Monday, March 05, 2007

I Hate That Guy


Every winter I get so goddam sick of snow and cold that I convince myself spring training is the greatest thing ever, but in the last week I've realized that unless you're there (and I've gone 4 times), it's not really that great.
The games are boring because mostly scrubs play, it doesn't matter who wins, and Sportscenter still talks about nothing but college basketball.
Man I hate college basketball.
It used to be good when there were seniors. Like Jamal Mashburn and Christian Laettner.
Now it's lame. March Madness can lick my bung.
(I saw Christian Laettner at a gas station in Minneapolis a couple years ago. He had a beard.)

So yeah, I could talk about Matt Garza's sore neck (not a big deal), Carlos Silva's 3 scoreless innings Monday (encouraging), or the offense still sucking (slightly annoying), but I'm not going to bother. When they start making cuts, then it might be worth watching.

In the meantime, I thought it might be amusing (it will at least be amusing to me), to add another series to the oft-delayed (but still active, I promise) 'ugliest athletes' series.

This one will be, athletes I really, really hate.
I know what you're thinking.
Oh, I don't know, hate's a pretty strong word.
Well if that's really what youre thinking, I hate you.

There's such a huge pool of candidates. So many guys over the years who just pissed you off so much it made your teeth hurt.

Deion Sanders. Michael Irvin. Leon Lett. Jerry Jones.

See how much fun that was, and that was just one team!
Please feel free to offer your own contributions to the list. I know that the world of professional sports is literally teeming with dudes you've got a major hate-on for. Let's hear 'em. (I'm also taking suggestions for more uglies. I'm leaning towards Zane Smith for the next one.)

So let's go with the hate. I'll start.

Athlete I Hate No. 1
Manny Ramirez
Boston Red Sox OF
Man I hate this guy.
The laziest, most selfish, defensively challenged shameful excuse for a baseball player in the Majors. He's like Terrell Owens, only he doesn't play as hard.
I even hate David Ortiz now just by association. And because Ortiz is the dumbass that coined the dumbass phrase 'Manny being Manny', which is a euphemism for 'Manny being a spoiled, selfish prick who doesn't care about winning and only cares about his horrible haircut and swinging for the fences. (Ironically, the photo I chose to run with this entry came from a blog titled 'I love Manny Ramirez'. So I picked it out of spite)
The dude's a great hitter, but he's the worst OF in baseball, a terrible baserunner, and he's just plain dumb. I hate dumb people.
Show up for camp on time for once asshole.
And you know why the Sox haven't traded you? Because no one wants your overpaid ass stinking up their clubhouse.
Manny Ramirez, I hate you.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Brian Cox, David Beckham, Allen Iverson, Shannon Sharpe (only as an commentator), Donavan McDusche, Jerry Glanville, Labron James, Kobe Bryant, Bill Walton, Bubba Franks, Yogi Bera, Jon Starrks, Eli Manning, just to name a few...

Ahhh, I feel better. Not only about myself, but I feel more relaxed. I must have been bottling that up for some time now.

Anonymous said...

Greg Ostertag, Karl Malone, Kobe, Mark Madsen, Stephon Marbury, Otis Nixon, Daunte Culpepper, Mike Tyson, Evander Holyfield, Juan Gonzalez, Shawn Bradley, Phil "man tits" mickleson, Scottie Pods, just to name a few and the guy I hate worst is that fuck job of an announcer the goddamned white sox have!

Rusty

ZSS said...

Conflicted?

Anonymous said...

I just did a search on Google for "I hate Manny Ramirez" (because I do), and this blog entry came up. I just wanted to say that reading it made my day a little better. I may actually be an Indians fan, but at least you and I can agree on one thing.

Anonymous said...

T.O. rules so does Micheal Irvin and Deion Sanders

Anonymous said...

Man you forgot the fact that manny is perhaps the best hitter to play the game, 9 time silver slugger,12 time all-star,Leader in postseason home runs and rbis of all time. Manny has donated 2 mil in charities. Hes one of the best payed athletes and manny worked extremely hard to make it to the bigs. Manny is a great person and just doesnt care about his public image. He isnt a terrible field either. He made a game winning over the wall catch in the 2004 postseason series agianst the yankees. Manny is the best hitter to play the game of baseball after pujols